Sunday 1 March 2009

Ooo-Errr! Kitchen Fucking Nightmare


Oh dear! What the fucking hell? Gordon Ramsey's claims to have won the World Cup with England in 1966 and to have scored all the goals have been rumbled as being exaggerations.

I can't fucking believe it! I'm sure I watched dumb-founded as a little boy the flickering black and white images on the next-door-neighbour's TV set, with Gordon Ramsey confounding the Germans with his incredible skill at cutting up cucumbers into slices faster than you'd believe possible! The way he quickly turned out perfect souffle after perfect souffle making their full back look like a third rate waiter. The dexterity with which Gordon made mayonnaise. It was truly the work of a footballing legend.

And now, what am I left with? All those illusions shattered. The foul mouthed fucking bastard was just walting it up.

Do you suppose it's in the name Gordon, makes you tell fucking great big porkies?

The Penguin

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Perhaps the flying scotsman should have been called the lying scotsman, there are enough of the cunts about, it seems.

Oldrightie said...

I thought he did as well.

Lawson said...

Christ on a stupid two wheel conveyance! It was the "Gordon (brown) Bounce" that won us the bloody World Cup in the kitchen and everywhere!
Don't you lot know anything about home economics?

Unknown said...

Presumably he's in league with the Home Economics Secretary - bringing you Porkies since 1997

banned said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WcZqwR9tbJE

& 2 & 3.