Tuesday, 17 March 2009

What Is The Secret Of Successful Comedy?

"If the Russians launch ICBMs I'll just karate chop them from the sky,
because I'm Superman!"


And Gordon McBroon, The Great Leader, is surely a comedic genius.

On the same day that the Russian Puppet President announces that he will modernise and increase the Russian Military Machine, particularly it's nuclear stuff, McCavity announces he'll cut back on our nuclear capabilities.

What a cunt!

The Penguin


Cuse said...

Boo Hoo.

You called me beastly names for using curse words. And now you have.

It's just not fair.

What the fuck are you trying to say in this piss-poor post Penguin? Other than you watch Sky news all the way through it's 15 minute bulletins?

The Penguin said...

Oddly enough, you're as wrong about this as you are on so much else. I never ever watch Sky News.

And I don't recall calling you any beastly names, other than Timothy or Maurice.

And who told you it was going to be fair?

As to what I am saying, it is implicit and obvious in the words used, and if you want the background story then the embedded link would provide that.

Do try and keep up, there's a good chap.

Captain Swing said...


Dont you understand English-its really quite straight forward.



Cunts like you probably dont see anything wrong in that.

We all know you have got the mental capacity of a Car Jack but please try to keep up.

You really got trashed posting as Right Arsehole didnt you.

Sue said...

Brown calls for a nuclear weapon free world - Gordon wants to save the world again!

Not Sky news, The telegraph!

The Penguin said...

You mean to say that "Cuse" fibbed?

I'm shocked and outraged!

Cuse said...

Ha ha. Fucking numbskull.

"Penguin links to Daily Mail article and claims moral high ground". Woman's Weekly is more politically savvy than the Mail, you fucking idiot.

Do you ever see NFN written on your hospital medical records?

Delightful. If Draper or any of his fucking Numpties ever read this, they'll be wetting themselves at your sheer ineptitude.

The Penguin said...

Sneer away, you sad little creature.

You may think the high-brow newspapers are superior, but of late the Daily Fear&Fury has been doing an excellent job on exposing politicians to the light.

Cuse said...

No NFN's?

How about FLK?

No-one said anything about high-brow, you cretin.

Why don't you just put an RSS feed on your front page so the Mail can spread it's bile to your regular 6 or so readers?

Oh, actually, you're all subscribers anyway aren't you. To that, Paul Staine's blog and The Trafalgar Club.

Fuck me your comments are going to look sparse again tomorrow.

Anonymous said...

Cuse has got TPS on his medical records and thinks its a compliment.

The Penguin said...

I doubt if they'll look as sparse as your brain scan.

Besides, do you notice any adverts on here?

You silly person, I don't do this for any reason other than it amuses me and enables me to spit bile at fools and villains.

What the fuck are YOU doing here? Other than massaging my ego?

Captain Swing said...

Its now gone 5.00pm and he has pissed off.
Shame because it was fun whilst it lasted.

Rab C. Nesbitt said...

Who the fuck was he anyway?

The Penguin said...

Some spotty-arse retard or other. I believe he has been given several kickings at Guido's, hence his obsession with naming Paul Staines.

Cuse said...

Ha ha ha.

Quick! Delete!

Fucking mug.

The Penguin said...

No, I quite like that one.

It can stay.

Cuse said...

"I believe he has been given several kickings at Guido's".

You made that up as well, didn't you Penguin?

It's touching, your love for the drunk.

The Penguin said...

Oh Cuse, you sad little creature.

Your postings at Guido's are still around in the ether and can be found quite easily by Googling.

It also follows that the thorough bitch-slapping that you got is also available.

Now play nicely or I shall have to chastise you.

Cuse said...

Oooh, hark at you.

Really, really, really. Using selective deletion to try and make your point is so last year Darling.

Come on then Big P.

Give me that Bitch slapping.

Because it didn't ever happen.

Fucking Mug.

The Penguin said...

Don't you think you're being a bit forward with all the "darling" stuff?

I mean, I'm just not that sort of a flightless bird. You and Dolly might like sharing bodily fluids, but please don't judge everyone by your own low standards.

Are you denying you got a right old kicking at Guido's? Shall I dig out and post the links?

Hmmmm, bloglobster, wasn't that something to do with you?

Cuse said...

Methinks you haven't yet because they don't exist do they?

Straight back to the homosexuality aren't you.

Fucking mug.

Christ - is your delete button broken now?

Only, you're not deleting things from me anymore. You like creating your own reality don't you.

Fucking mug.

The Penguin said...

Cuse said...

There we go! The true purpose of Guido hits the thread for the first time today!

"My Gaydar" couldn't resist the temptation to show his inner-self. You're one of three things aren't you mate:
- Gay
- Gay and in the closet
- Gay and not aware of it yet.

Like night follows day you lot. Night follows day.
January 15, 2009 2:17 PM
45govt said...

Not the Nine O'clock news - fascinating stuff. I always knew traitor Heath was a wrong 'un, and a cottaging cunt to boot, but this is an eye-opener.

I agree it deserves the widest possible dissemination, and I shall post it on the Labourgraph blogs when a suitable opportunity appears, with your permission.
January 15, 2009 2:17 PM
45govt said...

Ex-cuse me 2.17 - isn't that homophobic, you hypocritical cunt?
January 15, 2009 2:19 PM
Hopalong k'hasidi said...

Cuse said...

Guido - when are you going to comment on Wee Willy Hague being promoted? Or is that as much of a non-story to your fulsome band of Draper haters as it is to the rest of the planet?... and other posts

Don't think you're quite up to speed here old son. This blog is Guido's private property and he can do with it what he wishes, and he doesn't have to be impartial or to accommodate you, me or anybody else. The favoured response if you don't like the cut of his jib is to call him a cunt or go elsewhere.
I hear Gazza is exciting at the moment with free fireworks every night and pooftas not welcome, so you wont run into Mr Gaydar.
January 15, 2009 2:32 PM
Cuse said...

Thanks for your relentless optimistic intelligence "45govt".

Actually, the response is no. Because I couldn't care less if he was any of those 3; straight or even an asexual blob of amoeba.

Whereas I'm guessing Guido, you + "My Gaydar" do.
January 15, 2009 2:33 PM
Cuse said...

Gazza or Gaza Hopalong.

Gazza's an alcoholic mess.

But it is touching that you feel the need to defend fair Guido.
January 15, 2009 2:34 PM
Anonymous said...

I think someone who knows about domain name law should investigate who actually owns www.labourlist.org

looking at ICAAN.ORG policies and related case law the deliberate concealment of the true owner of the domain name could mean it is a "bad faith" registration.
January 15, 2009 2:37 PM
Tactical Voter said...


That was fast, whoever uploaded it.
January 15, 2009 2:39 PM
Free Thinker said...

More Zionist shite...
January 15, 2009 2:53 PM
Free Thinker said...

and... from a response above...

Everything isn't what it seems...

Churchill, Stalin and Hitler were all Tavistock/MI-6 agents.

Stalin eat shite.

Hitler shat on his girlfriends.

Churchill shat in his bath whilst getting pished and smoking cigars till 2 in the afternoon.

All cunts of all proportions. All chancers.

Get and read NZ author, Greg Hallett's 'Hitler was a British Agent'... operation Winie the Pooh', getting Hitler out of Berlin in 45.

And how many of you knew Hitler stayed on the Toxteth Road in Liverpool in 1912/13? His brother Alois and his wife Bridget had moved there from Dublin.

This is when Hitler went through his Tavistock deconstruction and while they screwed his mind instead of the usual homosexuality they gave him Coprophilia.
January 15, 2009 3:05 PM
Dennis said...

Not the Nine o'Clock News -- it is not customary to address Gweedo as "Your Grace". "Excellency", "Your Eminence", or "Exalted", however, are all acceptable.

The only blogger whom one may safely address as "Your Grace" is Archbishop Cranmer. To spare anyone who does not know him the trouble of reading his blog, his basic thesis is this:

1. Muslims are bad
2. The Pope is bad
3. A Muslim Pope would be very bad
4. The EU is bad
5. A Muslim Pope in the EU would be very, very bad
6. His Grace is erudite and likes long words

Hope this helps.
January 15, 2009 3:07 PM
Yak40 said...

Are you not missing a couple of bodies?

John Smith
Robin Cook

Dr Kelly
Hugh Gaitskell
January 15, 2009 3:19 PM
Benny said...

Didn't Maxwell have a fling with Hylda Baker in the 60s?
January 15, 2009 3:31 PM
Budgie said...

If I remember rightly the obituary for Honecker was the sole story on the front page of Maxwell's Mirror and edged in black.
January 15, 2009 3:33 PM
Anonymous said...

"Capn. Bob" Maxwell, was discovered floating off the Islas Desertas, some 20 kilometres south of Madeira. This was after his absence was noticed by the "temporary" crew running his cruiser. These islands,( a Portuguese nature preserve) coincidently, were thought to contain the treasure of Captain Blood or perhaps Bluebeard. Robert Falcon Scott went there searching for that treasure prior to searching for the Antarctic, with equal success.
January 15, 2009 3:39 PM
Glyn H said...

Brown and Maxwell have more in common than written above. Both were Labour MP’s not born in England. Both have sycophantic hangers on, often in common; Lord Donaghue, Campbell as mentioned but also Helen Liddle. Brown wrote his book on a communist (Maxton) and Maxwell published such dross. Both are or were bombastic and ill mannered to subordinates. Just when will Brown take an early bath in the Atlantic (not Red sea)?
January 15, 2009 3:42 PM
An asexual amoeba said...

Who you callin' a blob??
January 15, 2009 4:17 PM
My Gaydar Suffering said...

Can I be Blunt? Sure, as long as i'm Philby.

January 15, 2009 2:05 PM
Anonymous Cuse said...

There we go! The true purpose of Guido hits the thread for the first time today!

"My Gaydar" couldn't resist the temptation to show his inner-self. You're one of three things aren't you mate:
- Gay
- Gay and in the closet
- Gay and not aware of it yet.

Like night follows day you lot. Night follows day.

January 15, 2009 2:17 PM"

Congratulations you terrible cunt, you have now gone to the top of the list of My Gaydar Sufferings.
January 15, 2009 4:31 PM

I think my point is proven, and you win today's Prat Of The Day competition, narrowly defeating Right Wing Wanker.


Cuse said...

I think you're fucking brilliant.

Ha ha ha.

I'm going to start my own blog called "Delete the world in which I live that offends thine eyes" and just link through to this shit-heap of a site.


Fucking mug.

Barratt's or Barrett's?

The Penguin said...

You are correct.

I am brilliant, and I have the delete button for that which offends me.

And you are like an amoeba here in my blog, mine to squash or to suffer as I see fit.

Do let me know when you have a blog, I'll be sure to visit.

Oldrightie said...

I love "Cuse" and his ilk. If ever my passionate obsession about how fucking stupid Labour and socialism is, up they pop to confirm, in Dolly based pathetic infantile crap, my absolute understanding. Labour gives the most foul shite ever passed a good fragrance.
Does appear you have them rattled, Penny!

Cuse said...

Old Rightie! Its like an old pervert's reunion.

It's the Guido Jerking circle!

Penny - Penguin's a fucking girl!

Now then Rightie.

Was it the shoe shop or builder's who folded?

Penguin needs to know.

The Penguin said...

Builders or Shoe Shop is irrelevant. Both dreadful and both at risk thanks to McBroom's No More Boom And Bust.

Missing the point though, "Cuse" - caught getting slapped by the big boys at Guido's despite denial.

Now do run along and get your medication, and don't forget to put the acne cream on BEFORE your boxing gloves.

Cuse said...

ha ha ha.

That's our dirty little secret Penguin.

Your big red delete button stopping me pointing out your hilarious, fawning "disposal" of me.

Our dirty little secret.

Fucking mug.

Cuse said...

Builders or shoe shop is irrelevant?

Course it is.

because you got it wrong, you stupid girl.

Fucking mug.


Anonymous said...

"Course it is."

Should be; "'cause it is."


Faux Cu said...

I reckon Handlebum is a Russian plant.

Now that is more believable.