Sunday, 1 February 2009

Lord Voldemort Is Thinning Out The Undergrowth

Lord Voldemort of Boys and Hartlepool has begun the task of getting rid of any potential rivals for the overdue replacement of the mad Prime Mentalist.

You have to wonder who else it might have been who could have had a quiet word or two to Millipede Senior before his disastrous tour of the sub-continent, where just by chance the Dark Lord of Misrule would shortly be following along to put things right. Two jobs with but one stone dropped into the water, Millipede diminished yet further, and Voldemort enhanced.

Now we have reports about private meetings between The Great Saviour Of The World and Derek "Fat Pig" Simpson, £200,000 a year boss of trade union Unite, (most members on below average earnings), and McBroon's decision to pass the shitty parcel to Millipede Junior. Millipede Junior noticed it stank, so he shuffled it to a underling, who hid it in a cupboard. I wonder who has leaked this to the newspapers? Bottler Brown given a figleaf over the industrial unrest, and another potential contender smeared.

I suppose with all this to do, it is not surprising that Mandy has not found time to resume our little discussion at Dolly Dripper's wankfest.

The Penguin

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