Newspaper reports have been carefully edited to try and spare potty-mouthed Business And Bribes Secretary Lord Voldemort from accusations that he lacks Boris Johnson's particular flair for the judicious use of the vernacular idiom.
Angered by some remarks by hugely successful entrepreneurial businessman and billionaire Howard Schultz, Lord Voldemort let rip.
"That fucking cunt!! - who the fucking hell does he think he is, the fat bald cunt? How fucking dare he criticise the UK economy? The only reason the fucking UK fucking economy is in the shit is because fucking bastards like him have been ripping us off for cups of third rate fucking coffee! He can take his fucking Starbucks and shove them up his fucking enormous fucking arse! With a fucking muffin! Bugger me backwards with a brass bargepole, if I wasn't a fucking pacifist I'd punch his fucking lights out!"
The Penguin
5 comments:
I never thunk Mandy was capable of such macho language...
Sounds suspiciously like The Penguin to me.
Hey, are you implying I made it up? What do you take me for, a journalist? :-)
TDM has a good take, as usual ...
Penguin....you are Mandy and I claim my £5.......pmsl
Cato said...
"Penguin....you are Mandy and I claim my £5.......pmsl"
Darling Mr Cato
You are wrong! I am Peter (Lord!) Mandelson, and you may pay me £5 or, much, much more.
Much Love
Mandy
xx
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