What A Cosy Club

"I swear I have never ever had sex with that man!" says Gordon Brown

Hmmmm, I've been slagging off "Sir" James Crosby and the Failing Standards Authority, and now that I have additional information to hand it seems that I was wrong.

I didn't do nearly enough slagging.

It seems that "Sir" James, who the Prime Mentalist hardly knows despite their long and happy association, was appointed by The Great Chancellor to be Deputy Chairman of the Farcical Substandards Agency while he was still Chief Executive of HBOS. "In January 2004 Crosby was appointed by HM Treasury as Deputy Chairman of the Financial Services Authority"
per Wikipedia. Crosby bailed out of HBOS with his £9 million quid pension pot in July 2006.

So when in 2004 the sacked head of HBOS's Risk Management Team went along to complain to the FSA about the issues at HBOS, the chaps at the FSA were being asked to investigate their very own Deputy Chairman.

Hardly surprising they decided to accept an anodyne report from KPMG that things were fine at HBOS. Don't rock the boat, everything will be OK, after all, Gordon Brown has abolished Boom and Bust, new golden era for financial services has dawned.

Now as the auditors of HBOS (and also providing other lucrative services) KPMG were pulling in around £11 MILLION a year in fees. So although you'd think they ought to know what was going on at one of their biggest clients, it is hardly surprising that KPMG whitewashed the whistleblower. Independent my hairy backside.

And of course, all this cosy interconnectedness and large fees and perks all round is just fine, apart from the slight stench of corruption.

Still, not to worry, Hector Sants is still being overpaid to run the Fucking Stupid Arsewipes, and is shovelling £33 MILLION in bonuses into pay packets for his useless crew this very month, a day or so after Gordon declared no bonuses should be paid out for failure in the financial services sector. Funny that, because any normal person would think that the FSA had fucked up big time.

I am looking forward to the shareholders at HBOS (and other banks) looking to recoup some of their losses by sueing the fucking auditors for professional incompetence.

I'm sorry that the taxpayer can't sue the senior management at the Financial Services Authority for failing to do what they are overpaid to do.

And let's not forget who set this pile of shit up in the first place - McCavity Brown, the Financial Genius of Fife, who has no accountancy or financial expertise, no banking experience or expertise, no experience of running even a small business like a fucking Pie Shop, and has proven to be such a fine judge of character as well. The useless fucking cunt.

The Penguin