Sunday, 12 April 2009

What A Complete Twat

"Don't forget I know where the bodies are buried, Gordon!"

Damian "Peroni" McBride's resignation statement is just full of shit.

"I am shocked and appalled that, however they were obtained, these e-mails have been put into the public domain by Paul Staines.

Fucking hell, I wasn't expecting that to happen!

When Derek Draper originally suggested using a website to compete with the kind of material seen regularly on the Guido Fawkes blog, he asked me in a personal capacity to write up some of the stories doing the rounds in Westminster.

Gordon and I thought we should be secretly smearing the Tory toffs.

Derek and I decided in the end that this website was the wrong thing to do, and that Derek should not take his online efforts down to the level of Guido Fawkes and his Tory backers.

Then Dolly and I got cold feet, and Gordon's always been a fucking coward. We don't understand that Guido is actually independent.

I have already apologised for the inappropriate and juvenile content of my e-mails, and the offence they have caused, but I did not want these stories in the public domain - it is because Paul Staines has put them there, and I am sickened that he has done so.

I am sickened that I have to resign over this, I don't think I've actually done anything wrong.

However, we all know that when a backroom adviser becomes the story, their position becomes untenable, so I have willingly offered my resignation.

Gordon told me I'd have to resign, but not to worry as there'll be a quango or a peerage along as soon as the stench has blown over.

It has been an absolute privilege to work for Gordon Brown and the Labour government in the Treasury and in Downing Street, they will always have my full support, and I regret any embarrassment I have caused them.

I know where the bodies are buried Gordon, so don't leave it too long or I'll shit all over you!"

The Penguin

11 comments:

Pugwash said...

Lets hope SMEARGATE takes the whole shite down. Brown=Nixon

Lexander said...

Any bets on how much pay off he is going to collect. I am thinking about £100k or thereabouts. Thanks to Blogs it has unearthed some previously hidden slime in no 10. From now on watch further further attempts to gag websites and blogs.

The Penguin said...

If McCavity had any balls he'd have the wet job done a la Dr. Kelly and save the taxpayer a few quid and himself any more embarrassment.

Goodnight Vienna said...

Here you are Pingo - spread it around
McBride Downfall

Anonymous said...

There is something rotten in the heart of Gordon Brown's Downing Street, and it has infected places like Oxfam's HQ in Oxford, which are filled with Draper's and McBride's henchmen: Antonia Bance for instance, who is deputy director of the UK Poverty Programme, and is allegedly using Oxfam for her own party political ambitions, if you go by many of the comments on her blog.

Anonymous said...

What did McBride and Co expect to happen? Iain Dale has been talking about his FOI request for some time, and somewhere I read that Guido had one in too for these emails. Did the smearers just expect to deny the emails' existence?

I do hope that whoever manages FOI requests at Downing Street is checking what response McBride planned.

The Penguin said...

GV - Brilliant - how do I put that on my blog? (Technically incompetent!)

Goodnight Vienna said...

Just copy and paste the embed code you can see at the side of the video - go to the end and it will flash up - then just paste away. It's definitely one of the better ones.

The Penguin said...

Sorry to be so thick, what "embed code" ?

Never an 11 year old handy when there's a technical issue...

The Penguin said...

Ahhhh, I see....

it's either banned or compulsory said...

You missed out "sickened" from McBrides resignation; yes, sickened by the thought of his own imminent demise, cunt.