Wednesday 24 December 2008

The Biggest Turkey This Christmas



You know how it is, you spend a small fortune on a large Free Range Norfolk Black Turkey, it is nothing but fucking trouble to cook, tastes like cotton wool, and there is tons and fucking tons of it lurking at you throughout the festering season. Curries, Fricassees, Salads, Sandwiches, still there's fucking more of it and you are sick to fucking death of it long before anyone thinks of making soup from the carcass.

Bob Quick is this year's Biggest Christmas Turkey, it just keeps serving itself up, taste free and as welcome as a nasty cold sore.

Seems he sent the Anti Terrorist Heavies out to arrest that dangerous criminal Damien Green all wired up to record everything, without telling Mr. Green, naturally. I wonder what that would do for the defence barrister if it ever went to court? Mind you, the Met have form here, remember that twat "Sir" Ian Bliar recording telephone calls to the Solicitor General illegally?

Meanwhile, the website for Aphrodite Wedding Services has withdrawn tons of photographs for "security reasons". You can google for all the info you want in about 2 seconds, as although their own website doesn't have an address it does mention Westerham, and it is heavily promoted on loads of wedding services sites which do give the full postal address, even a handy map in many cases. The choice of name is nice, though, as Aphrodite was the bitch queen responsible for the Greek / Trojan War, having caused the breakdown of the marriage of Helen and Menelaus.

Curiously, it seems that the company doesn't actually have the correct licenses to operate, which possibly also invalidates any Insurance Cover. And, bearing in mind the actions of councils in Norwich and Fife recently, their habit of offering champagne to bride and groom is probably likely to result in a hefty fine.

I expect some proper journalist will do the necessary and provide details of when the company was formed, who the directors are, who the secretary is, whether it has properly filed all returns and accounts on time. I can't believe that one of the Met's finest would be guilty of failing to properly deal with tax and VAT issues, can you?

Anyone got any Mayonnaise?

The Penguin

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great google, you get the address, phone number email an' all.

Plus a map and a satellite pic. Hopefully some of those supposed millions of terrorists out there will go round and bomb him!

even worse, there is an apostrophe crime on the "about us" page of the website

Giolla said...

Don't even need to google for the address just do a whois:
whois aphroditeweddingservices.co.uk