Tuesday, 23 February 2010

No Bullies In Government - Official! By John Prescott

"I'd just like to make it quite clear, so there can be no misunderconfusion about the matter in hand, that there is not, never has been, and never will be, any bullying in the Labour Government what I served in for some many indistinguished years!

Despite enormous provocation Gordon Brown never kicked Tony Blair in the nuts, not even once, and I have never personally seen Damien McBride or Charlie Whelan bash a puppy's brains out on their desk.

Ed Balls might throw the odd copy of Beano onto the floor if someone brings him a cup of coffee which isn't quite to his exacting standards, but I've not heard anyone accuse him of biting junior staff. Mind you, we do have a good first aid kit in the Cabinet Office.

When you've been all at sea like what I have for so many years, you learn to take the rough with the smooth because it's not all plain sailing when you're in government. And if you want outside, I'll well up for it, so don't push your fucking luck!

And no, I'm not answering any of your fucking cheeky questions about shagging my secretary!"

As told to the Penguin by the Mouth Of The Humber.


Joe Public said...

JP admonishing a member of his staff for not being sufficiently subservient......


microdave said...

Is it 'cos I is thick?


Spotted at Mrs Dales.

The Penguin said...

"here, I've retired by where I used to work I got to see it like at first hand. That Gordon Brown started it when he threw a tangerine into the laminating machine and it fucked it right up and the cunt just laughed and laughed, so his little mate Millipede threw a banana into the smelter, caused a right mess the little shitestain. Then they looked round at that Mr Prescott and shouted to him to lob the pies - "I fooking can't! he said, "I've already fucking eaten them! Anyone got any icecream?" The fat twat!"

Perry said...

If that's a Tracey Temple view of fuckwit Prescott, no wonder she was all moist ...


Lion of England said...

Nothings new in pork pie land then?maybe
he has actually turned into one