Monday, 4 May 2009

Utter Amazement As Government Official Tells The Truth!!

"Too busy to comment"

There has been a wave of consternation rippling through the massed echelons of national and local politicians and fellow travellers today as news leaked out that a senior Government Official had dared to tell the truth.

Addressing 150 civil servants in Birmingham Border and Immigration Agency director Gail Adams told them that Birmingham stank of urine.

Aghast at being told the truth, several of the more senior civil servants present were so shocked that they joined an absolute frenzy of speaking the truth.

"Glasgow's a shit heap!"

"Cardiff is full of sheep shaggers!"

"The RAF should use Corby for bombing practice!"

"Haywards Heath is fucking boring as hell!"

"Gordon Brown is a complete wanker and mad as a box of stoats!"

"I'd shag Hazel Blears if I had two bags!"

Professor Spart-Chinn from the Used-To-Be-Polytechnic University of Birmingham said that the remarks were unhelpful and would damage Birmingham's chances of avoiding the recession. "Japanese investors are known for having very delicate nostrils," he told journalists from the Sparkbrook Nark and Informer, "and letting them know about how smelly Birmingham is is not going to make it attractive to them."

The Home Secretary was too busy polishing her barbecue to comment.

The Penguin


Fidothedog said...

Ok my couple: Swansea is full of thick inbreds who believe the concepts of wife and sister are on and the same.

Merthyr Tydfil, a toilet blocked with thick labour voting scum who all have dubious back problems an drive illegal taxis.

Anonymous said...

Newport-land of cunts.

The Penguin said...

I get some degree of comfort when I think of South Wales by remembering Bridgend.

Anonymous said...

Prepare to be clubbed to death by the scouring leek munchers who will no doubt take it upon themselves to tar you with a brush for being ...


Lexander said...

Don't leave out the biggest lot of moaners, groaners, troublemakers and speakers with a load of phlegm from the back of the throat - why Scousers of course. The reason Hatton just got beat up is that another dodgy Welshman sang our awful national anthem before the fight which roused his mongrel opponent to anger and perfection.

Stringy said...

Well worth a look, and some of the descriptions are priceless

Oldrightie said...

The difference between ferrets in a sack and the sack of shit that is Labour? Ferrets are cuddly, Labour stink.

Anonymous said...

well said, as for this comment:

"birminghas spending money to improve city"

how about

"money being pumped into birmingham from around the country but its still a 3rd world lost cause of the governments making."