Wednesday, 10 June 2009

This Will Please The Commissars!


From Mary Ellen Synon

"Somewhere in all the hoo-hah about the extraordinary showing by UKIP in the elections for the European parliament there may be getting lost the best and happiest story of the whole election: I mean the triumph of the new UKIP MEP for the south east, Marta Andreasen.

I first came across Andreasen, a Spanish accountant, shortly after she blew the whistle in 2002 on the vast opportunities for fraud at the European Commission. This exploded into what is still known in Brussels as 'the Andreasen affair.'

Yet she was only doing her job. In January 2002 she had been appointed chief accountant by the budget and anti-fraud commissioner. Within weeks, Andreasen saw 'serious and glaring' accounting irregularities in the Commission's books. She said the Commission was 'massively open to fraud.' She refused to sign off on the 2001 accounts. As she explained it to me later, her voice full of professional indignation, the Commission did not practice even the most basic double-entry book-keeping: this left the accounts open to interference.

It is a measure of her simple decency that she did not realise how dangerous professional integrity could be in Brussels. When she came under pressure from within the Commission to sign off on the 2001 accounts despite her concerns, she looked for support from the then-president of the Commission, Romano Prodi, and from the vice-president of the Commission who had been given the job of cleaning up the Commission after the last bout of corruption had come to light in 1999 -- and here is the black humour in all this, that vice-president was Neil Kinnock.

All the 'support' she got from Kinnock were attempts by senior Commission people to discredit her. They said her concerns 'had no foundation in fact.' Her personal and professional reputation was smeared. When she persisted in attempts to voice her concerns, Kinnock threatened her with disciplinary proceedings.Then when she tried to appear before the European Parliament to tell them what she had found in the accounts, she was sacked by fax from Kinnock.

At a press conference later in London, Andreasen said that Kinnock had been part of a 'cover-up' to prevent her exposing her concerns about the way the EU's (then) £63m budget was open to fraud. 'Despite official press briefings against me and appearances on this issue by Commissioner Kinnock and his staff, I have been repeatedly reminded of my obligation to remain silent.'

But she was right, and her concerns had plenty of 'foundation in fact.' As Christopher Booker and Richard North point out in their book The Great Deception, 'her charges were supported by another "whistleblower" within the Court of Auditors, Dougal Watt. In April he had independently lodged an official complaint against nepotism, corruption and mismanagement within the Court of Auditors itself, endorsed by 205 colleagues, for which he himself was dismissed from his post.' The following year, Accountancy Age magazine, knowing professional integrity when they see it, named Andreasen their 'Personality of the Year.'

The smears and threats made against Andreasen could have broken any other person. But they didn't break her. That is why, when I saw the picture of UKIP leader Nigel Farage raising Andreasen's arm in victory, it was the happy ending that almost never comes in politics. She will go back to Brussels in triumph -- and as an honest voice for Britain.

The only question is, why were the Tories so dull-witted not to see what a fantastic candidate she would be for the parliament? Why did they let UKIP snap her up? One suspects it is because the Tories still have that Brussels-establishment taint that has been colouring the party since the days of Howe and Hesletine. And one thing Marta Andreasen is not is Brussels establishment."

Some good news for us, not so good for the EUSSR!!

The Penguin

What Is It With Short People?


President Bruni of France, whose attempst to crawl up Obamas arse are nearly as bad as Jonah's, apparently decided he needed a little help in order to use the same podium as the other taller chaps at the D Day commemorations.

One wonders how he manages with Carla!
Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
To live

They got little hands
And little eyes
And they walk around
Tellin' great big lies
They got little noses
And tiny little teeth
They wear platform shoes
On their nasty little feet

Well, I don't want no short people
Don't want no short people
Don't want no short people
Round here

Short people are just the same
As you and I
(A fool such as I)
All men are brothers
Until the day they die
(It's a wonderful world)

Short people got nobody
Short people got nobody
Short people got nobody
To love
Randy Newman.

The Penguin

So Much For Transparency!

Would You Trust This Cunt?

Gordon Jonah McBroon promised a new era of honesty and transparency in a pathetic attempt to allay public outrage over MP's expenses and allowances.

So why is he refusing to publish the whitewash into Shahid Mailk's sleazy arrangements?

Nothing to hide, nothing to fear?

The Penguin

Bloody Hell, It's "Back To The Good Old Days!"


48 hour tube strikes, lunatic union versus Tory Toff.

Police brutality and corruption.

Economy requiring bailout by the IMF.

Shame I don't feel like a teenager this time round!

The Penguin

Tuesday, 9 June 2009

Look, Says The Chief Probation Officer Who Resigned, There Is Blood On Jack's Hands!


The chief probation officer who resigned over the murder of two French students by a convicted violent criminal and his accomplice, has launched a scathing attack on the justice secretary, Jack Straw.

Rather demolishes Slippery Weasel's attempts to blame everyone but himself despite "accepting full responsibility" a phrase much used but obviously little understood by NuLiebore politicians.

I do hope the legal eagles for the families of the victims have noticed this, and will be calling David Scott to the witness box.

The Penguin

Rory Bremner's Gordon Mika Song



Bremner - always a class act - unlike Jonah.

The Penguin

Gordon Is A Wanker



Congratulations LittleMatt925!

The Penguin

A Strange Sad "Victory"


The families of those murdered by the Omagh bomb have achieved a victory in their private prosecution of 4 members of the Real IRA.

That they had to take this course of action is shameful.

Why could not the authorities do the job they are supposed to do? More broken promises from Bliar and Mandelson, more proof of a Justice system which is in complete disarray.

The Penguin

Do You Need A Red Wheelie Bin?


Recycling and Wheelie Bin Mad Councils are considering whether they should offer householders the option of having a Red Bin.

After all, they provide Black Wheelie Bins for normal household waste, Green Bins for cardboard and plastic and paper, Brown Bins for Garden Waste, and woe betide the poor bemused householder who should make a mistake!

Now to keep up with the Health and Safety culture whereby binmen (or recycling executives) are not allowed to move bins which are deemed to be too heavy, or to help out by wheeling a bin down a drive, councils are thinking about Red Wheelie Bins for those who wish to dispose of an elderly relative or a partner who you have grown bored with.

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day

Loadsa Gravy!

"Baroness" Glenys Kinnock of Troughing

Shameless Cunt.
The Penguin

Monday, 8 June 2009

David "Banana" Millipede And Democracy


The jug eared spineless gurner just doesn't seem to understand what a democracy is actually about.

He was on the BBC One lunchtime news as I was having a bite to eat, I nearly spat chilli con carne across the kitchen in disbelief.

Can't swear to have exactly the right words, but he was suggesting that as Britain had defended democracy for so long it was terrible that the BNP now had two MEPs, and that this was a dreadful day for democracy.

You ignorant arrogant cunt!!!! Democracy means that the people have a vote and decide, and that you have to accept their decisions, wrong-headed though that may be. For fuck's sake, you snivelling wanker, if I have had to put up with 3 fucking general elections in which NuLiebore managed to con and gerrymander their way into gaining and keeping power, you'll just have to accept that the fucking BNP now have national recognition and are in line for millions in additional funding.

And it was NuLiebore who opened the door to them. You twat.

The Penguin

Who Will Jonah Turn To Next?

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

James Purnell Now Running Scared

"That Cunt Millipede Told Me To Do It!"

Having screwed his little store of courage up in order to jump ship (without having the Chipmunk's bravery in facing the cunt himself) and then finding that all his Blairite mates were not leaping into the icy water after him, poor little Jimmy Purnell has decided that he will not after all be doing a Geoffrey Howe.

Given the shit that the NuLiebore Project is in, what the fuckety fuck has the treacherous little wankstain got to lose?

He might as well go down with alll guns blazing, rather than slink abjectly away from an opportunity to set out his stall as a future leader.

This way, he loses everything. The Brownites will never forgive him, especially the vindictive Blinky who has to remain in charge of Battered Children and Useless Exams instead of replacing Badger at Number 11 and being able to be real neighbourly with Jonah, and now the Bliarites will think he is a coward, unable to face the wrath of McBroon in the Commons.

What was it that was said about the brave man dies but once, but the coward many times?

The Penguin

Downfall - European Election



By Man Widdicombe. Excellent.

The Penguin

What Is It With This Obscure Word?


"Resile"

I'm 53 this month, I have a degree in English, and I had to look this up in the dictionary the other day when the One Eyed Snot Gobbling Nutter used it.

Now Harriet Harpy is using it.

That's really cocksucking, the fucking hypocritical slag.

The Penguin

David Blunkett Attacked By Mad Cow


David Blunkett, Holder Of The Robin Cook Memorial Cup For Ugliest MP

It seems that even the bovine population are fucking angry with NuLiebore, as a herd of cows attacked former Home Secretary and adulterer David Blunkett while he was out walking in the countryside.

He suffered a broken rib, and was lucky that the cow only struck him a glancing blow.

He failed however to pick out the guilty animal at an identity parade, so the CPS have decided they cannot press charges.

The Penguin

Democracy Still Alive, Just, In Brown's Britain


Why Do You Never See Nick Griffin And Ed Balls In The Same Room?

Despite the gerrymandering with electoral borders, and the postal voting scandals such as at the Glenrotten by-election, democracy is still just about alive and kicking.

The voters have given their verdict on McBroon, and it's not a pretty sight. Labour beaten in Wales for the first time since the First World War! Two BNP MEPs!!

I don't care for the BNP, but they are a legitimately set up political party, they fought their campaign by the rules, and they have persuaded sufficient people of their merits that they now have representation at the EUSSR talking shop. What they can achieve remains to be seen, but I am delighted that this sends a very very clear message to the mainstream parties and their political elite, that the ordinary working class are no longer to be taken for granted.

The Penguin

Oh Dear, The Whitewash Is The Wrong Shade!

"For Fuck's Sake, It Was Only A Few Million Quid!"

It seems that the first draft of the whitewash into "Sir" Ian Bliar's cronyism and corruption is not quite the right shade of white.

In fact, it is so fucking white that no-one will believe it, even the gullible cretins who continue to vote NuLiebore or think Ken Livingspart has their best interests at heart.
So "Sir" Ronnie Flannel has been asked to change the shade a little so people might think he's actually investigated the matter.

Then the fucking plod wonder why the public have lost respect for them?

The Penguin

Sunday, 7 June 2009

NuLiebore's Culture Of Targets Is Working Out Really Well

"Fuck Me, Is That The Time? Where Is My Medication?"

Actually, no it bleeding well isn't.

SATS are a disaster despite the lies and obfuscation by Ed "Blinky" Balls, and we all know how good Social Services are are ensuring the safety of children like Peter Connelly (sadly not the only case, even in the last year) while meeting ludicrous targets.

The Police are meeting targets but crime is soaring despite the statistics the Home Office try and promulgate. The new Chief Commissar of Greater Drugchester has blown the lid off this, so let's hope he avoids woodland walks or bottles of gin on Snowdon.

And in the NHS, meeting a stupid target for waiting times in A&E means that patients are left in ambulances or in corridors before being "accepted" into the system. Brilliant!

The Penguin

The Ever So Fragrant Caroline Keeps Putting The Boot In!


"What's That Smell? Has Somebody Been Eating Kippers?"

Seems Caroline is not yet finished kicking the sack of shit.

Way to go girl!

The Penguin

Diane Arselicker Abbott Claims Brown Was Not Boooed?



Stupid Cow. BBC footage embed code courtesy of Crown Blogspot.

The Penguin

Lord Sugarcube of Tate and Lyle Fires Jonah



Crown Blogspot, of course. Brilliant!

The Penguin

So Who Have We Got Running (!) The Country?


Following Gordon's latest relaunch and reshuffle and rearrangement of the deckchairs, what Titans of towering intellect and moral authority do we find if our stomachs are sufficiently strong to enable us to hold our noses and look around the cabinet table?

Prime Mentalist - Jonah McBroon, who's alethiometer provides the air conditioning required to circulate the fetid atmosphere, whilst wafting the stench of corruption and piss-stained trousers around the room. Noted for his dithering and nose-mining operations.

Deputy Leader of The Labour Party and Wimmins Minister - Harriet Harperson. Ghastly strident feminazi who seems blind to her own privileged background and her hypocrisy. I'm amazed she actually has children to send to private schools, I do wonder how it is possible that they could be conceived in the usual manner, surely she wouldn't stoop to letting Jack Dromey actually put his knob in her sacred grove and squirt some man juice up her?

First Secretary of State for Buggery - Lord Voldemort, that well known mortgage fraudster and slimebag, now amazingly re-united with his long time enemy McBroon at a price that we have to pay even when these cunts are thrown out.

Justice Secretary - Jack "The Slippery Weasel" Straw, deeply tainted but as a man completely without principle or honour, clinging to office like a turd on a blanket.

Chancellor of the Exchequer - Alastair Darling, whose financial efforts on his own behalf are sadly not matched by his efforts on behalf of the country. Gordon's sock-puppet who unexpected had a backbone injected up his arse by his ugly dumpling wife, who probably decided she likes the perks of living in 11 Downing Street and told him to get some balls or she'd rip his off.

Secretary of State for Cruelty To Children - Ed "Blinky" Balls, the Judas Iscariot who couldn't forget his ex-best friend Damien quickly enough. Good thing he'll have his hands full fighting with Voldemort, might mean less time to fuck up Education.

Secretary of State for Health - Andy "Eyeliner" Burnham. Lucky little gobspittle can now jump the queue and have the quacks investigate why his testicles have not dropped.

Home Secretary - Alan "Postie" Johnson, a bloke so thick he spend years and years delivering letters before he realised that he could go the union route and have a nice dry office. Is it just me or does his face have that nice "Glenmorangie" glow?

Defence Secretary - Bob Jobsworth, what a fucking joke. We're still fighting 2 illegal wars, the Armed Forces are forced to borrow kit and ammunition from the fucking Septics, and after a part time Sec Def and then a quitter, they get this moribund cunt!

Europe Minister - Lady Kinnock. So, no one in the House of Commons good enough that Jonah has to bring in this parasite? Or just no-one left that he could trust? Still, it keeps another of the NuLiebore Aristocracy at the trough.

Foreign Secretary - David "Banana" Millipede, kept his job only because of Jonah's cowardice and lack of real authority. A fucking joke at home and abroad, with his fucking sticking out ears and over-sized gob, he barely looks humanoid.

Fuck it, I'm losing the will to live listing this bunch of third rate chancers.

Some other poor sod is welcome to complete it!

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day



"Sir" Ian Bliar.

Whitewashed Cunt!
The Penguin

The NuLiebore Aristocracy

So Much Public Money, So Little Use Or Worth!

One of the very worst results of the botched "reshuffle" is the installation in the once-proud House of Lords of the ghastly Glenys Kinnock.

How on earth this family of awful Welsh windbags and cocksuckers has become NuLiebore Aristocracy is beyond rational comprehension. It's not even as though they were any fucking good at anything, witness Neil Kinnock's useless and feeble failure to curb corruption in the EUSSR - he gagged and then sacked the whistleblower!
Sadly, even a change of government will leave them sucking on the public teat.

Culling would be good.

The Penguin