Thursday, 30 April 2009

Hurrah! More Dance Routines Are Promised!!

Another day, another disaster for The Great Dancer, Our Unelected Leader, Jonah "Moral Compass" McBroon, Prime Mentalist and Farmy Farmer.

Bill Cash MP at PMQ's yesterday asked if Gordon was planning more Youtube appearances, and it seems we have indeed got more wonderful break dancing routines to look forward to.

I'm sure Crown Blogspot will do the necessary, because I surely don't know how to!

The Penguin

"Big Issue! Big Issue! Concentrating on the Big Issue!"

"We can't afford to have the Gurkhas here, I've got my pension to fund!"

In the face of the "resign" petition currently with over 30,000 signatures and going ballistic, and the teeth of his craven absentee defeat over the Gurkhas, what is The Great Leader doing?

"Asked for Mr Brown's response, his spokesman said: 'What he is doing is focusing on addressing the needs of the people of the country and the big issues we face in terms of the global economic downturn.' "

He and his fellow travellers should be focusing on getting some training in for their future careers selling the Big Issue.

The Penguin

About Fucking Time!! Now Get The Rest Of Them!

Seems some justice has been done at long last. 4 sackings.

However, there are more people still in post who have Peter Connolly's blood and suffering on their hands, if not their consciences (otherwise they'd have resigned by now).

And why have we not heard about any sentencing of his murderers? What is going on?

The Penguin

Honest, Guv, I Just Accidentally Taped Over My ID Numbers!

"I just don't know how it can have happened, Guv, it must have been an accident!"

From the Evening Standard.

"Officers preparing to police the G20 protests were told to remain "calm and restrained", according to a report on the Met's handling of the event.

Police were also warned to "react professionally to the events in front of them" in briefing sessions in advance of the protests.

In addition supervisors were told to ensure officers displayed ID numbers, according to the report being presented to the Metropolitan Police Authority today."


"Sir Paul has already angrily criticised officers who fail to wear ID numbers and warned they face the sack if they did so deliberately. Video footage of the G20 protests has shown a handful of officers did not display them."

Well, that's all right then, isn't it? Obviously it was entirely accidental.

The Penguin

The Weasels Are Still Trying To Wriggle Out Of Being Decent And Honest

Yesterdays' vote in the House of Commons to give all Gurkhas a blanket right of settlement was decisive and clearcut, involving 75 NuLiebore abstentions and 27 rebels despite the heavy whipping and late bribes.

And yet, when the fucking useless Home Office Minister For Letting Somalis Into Britain returned to make a statement, it was still weasel words, delays, obfuscation and a complete lack of any understanding of the moral imperative underlying this situation. If Gordon Brown had a moral compass, it would be spinning like the buried giants of Old Labour in their graves at his behaviour. And apparently he had not the courage to stay and take part in the debate or to vote himself. The fucking coward.

This issue is not going to go quietly away. The Gurkhas deservedly have the support of a massive majority of people in the country as a whole, and any MP who does not wish to face wrath on the doorstep when they start campaigning for re-election would do well to remember that the internet now allows voters to know EXACTLY how their elected representatives have voted on every issue.

The Penguin

How On Earth Does This Buffoon Become An MP, Let Alone A Minister?

"Honest, it's not all that mutual wanking, it's choroideremia!"

NuLiebore have an absolute wealth of fuckwits to choose from, but sure way up there in the top percentile has to be Sion Simon?

Best of friends with Andy "Underpants" Bryan, Sion is the clever imbecile whose puerile and crass "Spoof Cameron Video" saw Dave's genuine traffic increase tenfold. Now he's in the headlines again for another crappy poor taste joke which the public obviously didn't appreciate.

Unmarried, one does wonder if he represents the pink wing of NuLiebore? Could it be that he and Underpants will be found to have shared hotel rooms at Nuliebore conferences and then both claimed for the expense? He's certainly stupid enough.

And as a junior minister in Ed Balls well fucked up ministry, he's obviously doing a great job, cancelling meetings with MPs to go to the gym. Let's home he never passes his DNA on to anyone who can get pregnant.

The Penguin

Oh What A Shame, The Pigs Are Getting Worried!

"But I thought it was quite the done thing, and besides, would remain a secret!"

Rumours abound of the revelations that will ensue when the MPs expenses are published.

It seems that there have been various indiscretions and even downright fraud. In some cases, not only will their careers be over, so will their marriages, which will cause them considerable financial pain.

I do hope that the CPS will also step in and prosecute in proven cases of fraud, but I won't be holding my breath. My nose, possibly.

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day

"If You Do That Again, Mister, I'll Tell The Teacher!"

Ed Balls.

So fucking useless he can't even organise the spending of money.

Absolutely Useless Cunt.

The Penguin

Charity Begins At Home, After All.


Seems it stays there as well, at the Commonwealth Development Corporation, which under the woeful and inept mismanagement of the Department For International Development has done fuck all except pay ludicrous salaries to it's chief executive and other trough pigs.

Richard Laing took £970,000 in pay and bonuses in 2007, while other senior executives earned an average of £435,000.

Fucking nice work if you can get it.

DFID is represented in Cabinet by the Secretary of State for International Development (Douglas Alexander MP), and in the House of Commons by Minister of State (Gareth Thomas MP) and two Parliamentary Under-Secretaries of State (Ivan Lewis MP) and (Michael Foster MP). Useless tossers all of them.

The Penguin

Wednesday, 29 April 2009

How Long Has This Been Going On????

Far too long, some of it!

The Penguin

Where's Dolly?

Missing, presumed undead. Definitely unclean.

For a while you could hardly avoid the podgy unshaven knob-head, all over the TV and radio like some sort of nasty rash, cropping up like an unpleasant and painful boil in the print media, and of course, trying to take over the blogosphere like swine flu.

And yet suddenly - he's vanished!

Has anyone seen Dolly?

(Not that I'm concerned for his family, after all, they've got Anton to look after them.)

The Penguin

Another Killer Free On Our Streets, Thanks Jack!

Driving down a road near your children?

Our wonderful Justice System has freed another killer to walk unhindered amongst us, perhaps even to get behind the wheel of another car, again whilst having no licence, or insurance, and killing another child. At the time of the first killing Aso Mohammed Ibrahim was a failed asylum seeker and should have been deported. Now, still working the system, he's out on bail whilst appealing yet again against deportation. Give Phil Woolas another medal.

Meanwhile Slippery Weasel Jack Straw says he is "concerned".

The Penguin

Burying The Evidence?

The funeral is taking place today of Ian Tomlinson, who died in mysterious circumstances after being assaulted by police when he was innocently caught up in the kettling of G20 demonstrators in the City of London.

The results of the 3rd post mortem, requested by m'learned friends on behalf of the policeman who was caught on video cameras assaulting Mr. Tomlinson, have not so far as I know been made public. One does wonder why?

One also wonders who is paying for plod's legal team?
But never mind, we've got Swine Fever to dominate the media for a while, plenty of time to bury lots of bad news.

The Penguin

One Hundred Fucking Million Quid For Fuck All

Makes you wonder why we bother having Security Services, Anti-Terrorist Police, and a Crown Prosecution Service. They blow £100 MILLION and can't get a conviction on three mates of the 7th July bombers. What the fuck were they doing bringing a prosecution (twice!) when they have to admit they had no direct evidence? Desperately trying to justify their fucking budgets?

Still, good to know that m'learned friends will have trousered loads of taxpayers' money in the process, and will probably get loads fucking more when the accused and acquitted sue for compensation.

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day

"Tony, do you think my dog is good looking?"

David "The Visionary" Blunkett.

Stupid Cunt.

The Penguin

The Worms Are Turning

A Dangerous Illegal Immigrant Terrorist under Police Guard

Seems that the fellow travellers on NuLiebore's GravyTrain are beginning to become restless.

Perhaps they sense that the public have had enough of them, in particular of their shameless troughing.

And some of them seem to have noticed that there is considerbale public anger over the Government's disgraceful and dishonest treatment of Gurkha veterans, despite the High Court ruling last year. That wonderful team at the Home Office, Jacqui The Fat Lodger and Phil Custard Face Woolas are facing a rebellion.

They should also be facing trial for treason, the cunts.

The Penguin

UPDATE : The Government were defeated. I bet no cunt will fucking resign though. No honour, no dignity, no shame = New Labour.

This Is Just SO Wrong!

"I'm pratically anorexic, honest!"

Some hugely overweight fat ugly chav scrubber who made the record books by being that fattest person ever to give birth, costing the NHS hundreds of thousands of pounds to hire in cranes and heavy lifting gear, is busily fattening up her little black bastards (for the daddy fucked off shortly after getting the monster pregnant, in sadly typical black fashion, which is why so many black boys and girls grow up in disfunctional families with no lasting male role model) on benefits.

She boasts of giving them their first MacDonalds at 6 months. She claims to be too busy to do cooking or cleaning, but is demanding a council house. Her idea of home cooked is a microwaved pie or lasagne. She claims to feed the babies vegetables every Sunday. She only bothers to get dressed once a week to go and claim her benefits.

She claims her weight problem is her glands, of course, and not the monumental amount she shoves down her neck every day.

What the fuck are the Health Nazis and the Social Service Gestapo doing to help? Fuck all.

So that's plenty more expense for the NHS coming along soon.

The Penguin

One Promise That NuLiebore Will Keep?

"Never mind the Ball, darling, we'll get you into the Trough!"

Is this nepotism going to be the one promise that NuLiebore actually keep?

The Penguin

Tuesday, 28 April 2009

Devil Stick Peat

My friend Devil Stick Peat and colleagues go to places like Beslan and Iraq to try and teach the children how to laugh again.

Big respect.

The Penguin

Timney Of The Week

Mrs Jacqui Timney.

A complete Timney, no redeeming features whatsoever except for the soapy tit wank which Gordon likes.

The Penguin

Thats The Way We Do It!

First Dan Hannan, then the President of Chile, now the Prime Minister of Poland.

Giving Brown a public kicking.

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day

Making Italian Prison Look Good

Tessa "Bribery" Jowell.

Turkey-necked Cunt.

The Penguin

Brilliant Timing, The Secret Of Great Comedy!

Not Having Any Work Will Set You Free!

Gordon McBroon scuttles off to pose for photographs at Auschwitz, with a great fanfare of publicity about his moral fucking compass and his fucking son of the manse bollocks to try and establish some sort of legitimate connection to try to validate his gurning spastic presence there.

Meanwhile there's a lovely stinking row going off in Birmingham where the Labour Party's Mahmood Hussain, a Muslim and former lord mayor of Birmingham, refused to back a local activist in her attempt to be selected as a prospective councillor because she is white and Jewish.

The Penguin

What Are They Hiding, And Why?

An image from an era when you went to hospital to be cured not killed.

When you think of all the well publicised Hospital Scandals and all the inquiries and hand-wringing and protestations of "lessons learned" and "never again (until next time)", one may well wonder what on earth is so dreadful that the authorities do no want discovered over the deaths of 92 patients at a hospital in Gosport?

It's usually the cover-up that causes the most trouble. Come a change of regime in Downing Strasse, it may be very interesting to have this investigated thoroughly.

The Penguin

How Low Can Gordon Go?

Our Great Unelected Leader declared on being anointed as Prime Mentalist that he was not into spin, or celebrity squeezing, or the grand standing that so defined the Bliar Years.

Fucking Lying Hypocrite. He spends mmore on spin than Bliar, is always sucking up to celebrities, and is currently dashing from photo opportunity to photo opportunity.

Yesterday was Afghanistan and the troops, then onto being ignored in Pakistan.

Today it's Auschwitz, where I expect he will give a lively perfomance of his "Dance Of The Comedian" before breaking into a heart rending "If I was a wealthy man" from Fiddler On The Roof.

The Penguin

Lord Plonker

"You can tell I'm a twat because I tuck my tie into my trousers!"

Want to invest £8 MILLION in some speculative ventures offering a 20% return? Even if you have to borrow most of it, and mortgage the family home up to the hilt? Don't bother getting proper legal or financial advice, just hand it over as fast as you can.


The Penguin

Monday, 27 April 2009

Avro Vulcan - Very Impressive

Mmmm, so glad they saved and restored this 'plane. Makes me feel about 8 years old again!

The Penguin

Snout In The Trough, Living In A Pigsty

Dirty little chancer.

The Penguin

I Wonder What He Saw In Her?

It's a complete mystery.

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day

Alan Duncan, for trying too fucking hard to be funny.

Silly Cunt.

The Penguin

Surrounded By Mediocrity And Scum

If you were of a saintly disposition, you might feel a slight twinge of sympathy for The Great Unelected Saviour Of The World, Jonah McBroon. Luckily I'm not and I don't, but when you look around his "Government Of All The Talents" you have to wonder how the fuckwit has managed to pick such a bunch of cretins and scoundrels.

Where to start?

Tessa Jowell, now mired in the Gould-gate Bribery Scandal, whose blatant attempt to distance herself from her sleazebag husband, now convicted of bribery, fooled no-one.

Ed Balls, "so weak" and tainted by his close association with Damian McBride as well as his "interesting" domestic arrangements, whose attempts to blame everyone else over the SATS fiasco have returned to bite his sorry arse.

Mrs Timney, definitely well past her sack-by date, incompetent as well as corrupt and greedy.

David "Banana" Millipede, the most useless and inept Foreign Secretary ever, even in a group that includes Margaret Becket.

Geoff Hoon, whose very name has acquired a certain cachet, universally reviled trough-pig sucking on BAA's cock.

Jack "The Slippery Weasel" Straw, floating like a greased turd on the scummy surface of the Whitehall cesspit, contaminating everything he touches while accepting no responibility for the filthy mess he leaves in his wake.

Alastair Darling, apparently happy to go down in the history books as the weakest and most useless Chancellor ever because he is too scared to say "NO!" to the snot-gobbler.

Lord Voldemort, a clever man but damaged goods because of his past misdemeanours and mistakes.

Harriet Harpy, delusional and treacherous champagne socialist, consumed by her daft ambitions and feminazism.

Hazel Blears, nasty shrill ginger midget without an opinion of her own.

Tommy "Two Dinners" Watson, who is apparently fond of a curry, presumably to mask the taste of Gordon's cock.

I could go on, but I feel a bit nauseous.

The Penguin

Sunday, 26 April 2009

What's That Fucking Awful Stench?

Warning! The so-called Titan Arum, Amorphophallus Titanum Brownensis, which comes into season once every 4 or 5 years when circumstances force it to achieve an election, is shortly going to be going tumescent.

A native originally of Scotlandshire, the Titan has been transplanted into Whitehall, an area of London infamous for being infested with various pernicious pests, where it has unfortunately thrived in the fetid conditions.

The Titan exudes an unpleasant smell at all times, but when in "flower" the stench is almost unbearable, and attracts carrion beetles and vultures who fight over the rancid emissions.
Best avoided.

The Penguin

Let's Just See That "Mad Grandad" Dancing Comedian One More Time!

Seems there's egg on face.....

Video by Crown Blogspot

The Penguin

English Electric Lightnings Flying In South Africa


The Penguin

Caption Competition

Hoon Of The Day

Lord Taylor Of Blackburn, bagman to arms dealers and anyone else with loads of money.

Greedy Corrupt Cunt.

The Penguin

Tessa Jowell's Olympic Bribery Scam

"She learnt it all from me!"

Oh dear, seems like Tessa Jowell has been caught trying to bribe the local Labour Party in Erith and Thamesmead by suggesting that if they had her beloved Georgia Gould as their MP she'd be able to channel the area loads of Olympic 2012 dosh.

She's obviously not so very seperated from her husband, recently found guilty of receiving bribes from the Italian President. Another completely corrupt NuLiebore family.

The Penguin

Saturday, 25 April 2009


When we had a British Aircraft industry, betrayed and fucked over by the treacherous Harold Wilson and Tony Benn.

Old Labour, NuLiebore, same bastards.

The Penguin

The Sooner The Better

Apparently Martin McGuinness is likely to be bumped off by dissident republicans.

Could I just ask that they don't forget Gerry Adams?

The Penguin

Rats Fighting To Get On To Sinking Ship

Two NuLiebore Cunts

New evidence has emerged of postal-voting irregularities in the race to be the next NuLiebore parliamentary candidate in the previously safe London seat of Erith and Thamesmead.

Oddly, the plod have refused to get involved - maybe the Damian Green fiasco and the loss of Jacqui's favourites has lessened enthusiasm in the ranks of the Met for getting involved with politicians?

I think it would be hilarious to have Georgia Gould, 22, blonde, eminently shaggable, elected. More proof of the NuLiebore Aristocracy and nepotism in action.

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day

Phil Woolas.

Utter Utter Cunt.
The Penguin

Friday, 24 April 2009

Canada, Just So Unlucky.

Canada is the place that could have had it all. They could have had American Technology, French Culture, and British (prior to Bliar and Brown) Government.

Instead, by cruel fate, they have British Technology, French Government, and American Culture.

And now, they also have Northumbrian Scenery.

I hope they have not also stolen the Ship Hotel from Seahouses!

The Penguin

Are You Proud Of Yourself, Hazel Blears?

"That's £2,947 Mr. Hill! £2,947!! That'll Teach You To Challenge NuLiebore!!!"

Hazel Blears, the ever-cheerful little chipmunk wheeled out so often by NuLiebore to defend the indefensible, now has a pensioner's death on her tab.

Hope you are feeling proud, Hazel!
The Penguin

"Burning A Bit Rich!"

Shame it wasn't Margaret Beckett....

The Penguin

No More Boom And Bust?

If I recall aright, Gordon has done away with boom and bust.

1) Tony Blair: 1997 Conference Speech

"I want this to be the New Labour Government that ended Tory boom and bust forever."

2) Gordon Brown: July 1997

"Today, the Bank of England has agreed with me that, if we are to prevent the cycle of boom and bust, inflationary pressures in the economy, which the previous Government negligently failed to tackle, must be brought under control "

3) Gordon Brown: November 1997

"I am satisfied that the new monetary policy arrangements will deliver long-term price stability, and prevent a return to the cycle of boom and bust."

4) Gordon Brown: April 1998

"We will not return to the stop-go, boom-bust years which we saw under the Conservatives. "

5) Gordon Brown: May 1998

"The Government have put in place policies to deliver that objective and are determined to avoid a return to boom and bust."

6) Gordon Brown: June 1998

"rigorous financial discipline that, together with monetary stability, ends once and for all the boom and bust that for 30 years has undermined stability "

7) Tony Blair: February 1999

"Moreover, for decades we have been prone to far greater swings in the economic cycle than our continental counterparts. It has been boom and bust....Under this Government, there is an entirely new framework for economic management in place "

8) Ruth Kelly: November 1999

"The Government have rejected the boom and bust of the Conservative party "

9) Tony Blair: November 1999

"We have the best chance of ending boom and bust in years."

10) Gordon Brown: November 1999

"Indeed, Britain was set to repeat the old, familiar cycle of boom and bust. Since then, we have created and rigorously adhered to a new framework of modern economic management "

10) Alistair Darling: January 2000

"On top of that, we have a healthy and stable economy and an end to the boom and bust that characterised the Tory years."

11) Alan Johnson: February 2000

"The Government's first priority on coming to office was to secure long-term economic stability and put an end to the damaging cycle of boom and bust."

12) Gordon Brown: March 2000

"Britain does not want a return to boom and bust. "

13) Tony Blair: 2000 Conference Speech

"The first big choice: a government with the strength to deliver stability, or a government that takes the country back to boom and bust."

14) Gordon Brown: November 2000

"Our approach is to reject the old vicious circle of the '80s--rising debt, higher long-term interest rates, higher debt repayment costs, lower growth, higher unemployment, then enforced cuts in public spending. That was the old boom and bust."

15) Gordon Brown: March 2001

"We will not return to boom and bust."

16) Ruth Kelly: May 2002

"We must avoid a return to the days of boom and bust that manufacturers had to endure for a long time under the Conservatives."

17) Yvette Cooper: May 2004

"We know that they want to turn the clock back, but it would be foolish to turn it back to a policy of boom and bust."

18) John Prescott : January 2005

"Labour economic stability has replaced Tory boom and bust "

19) Tony Blair: 2005 Conference Speech

"In the first two terms we corrected the weaknesses of the Tory years: boom-and-bust economics "

20) Alistair Darling: March 2005

"As I said, there are two approaches—first, a strong economy, stability and helping families or, secondly, the Tory cuts, the undermining of stability, and a return to the boom and bust of the 1990s."

21) Gordon Brown: March 2006

"I have said before: no return to boom and bust."

22) Gordon Brown: December 2006

"Boom and bust is a term that applied to the Conservative years and two of the worst recessions in history"

23) Gordon Brown: March 2007

"We will not return to the old boom and bust."

24) Alistair Darling: June 2007

"...acknowledges the outstanding performance of the economy under this Government with the longest unbroken economic expansion on record, in contrast to the boom and bust of the previous Government "

Just as well, or we could be right in the shit as this Global Financial Problem (from America) gives us the worst recession since the 1920s.

The Penguin

Your Taxes Are Dictated By Brussels, Not Just By The Cabbage in No. 11

"It's not just Gordon's hand up my arse!"

It seems that control of fiscal policy is no longer in the Chancellor's limp hands, it is Brussels who actually set the agenda.

Tax policies which do not conform to EUSSR standards have to be adjusted, even if it fucks over UK taxpayers who have made decisions based on the tax regime here.

High time we told the EUSSR to fuck right off. They'll still want to sell us Mercedes and BMWs, Champagne and Strawberries.

The Penguin

ToughTimes, But Not At The Top Trough!

Some Government Ministers Hard At Work

Good to see that in these times of hardship and asuterity for the rest of us, that the Pigs at the Top Trough are shielded from adversity.

In fact, Government Ministers have been given a 52% increase in their "Fine Dining" budget to an astounding £800,000. Of course, this is on top of their bloated salaries, second homes fiddles, unaccountable expenses, and the cossetted free-ride world of ministerial cars and secretaries to shag.

The Penguin

Police Priorities In London

"As long as Jacqui can get her Kebabs safely, my work is done!"

It seems that the Met and the British Transport Police have some very odd priorities.

They can field hundreds of hyped up thugs to bash demonstrators and protesters who are not breaking the law, but fail to do anything to stop a prolonged attack on tube trains in Acton. It has been suggested that this attack took place over the course of two hours and caused severe damage to 11 trains.

I do hope that Boris gets a grip on the new Commissar's goolies and squeezes them hard.

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day

"This Government's A Fucking Disgrace, The Fuckers Won't Stay Bought!"

Bernie "the Bung" Ecclestone.

Stunted Cunt.

The Penguin

Thursday, 23 April 2009

The Dancing Comedian - Was It All For Nothing?

The Dancing Comedian

Tragedy seems to be inevitable for the Dancing Comedian, whose amazing efforts to entertain the world have been so well received by aficianados of Acid House.

It seems that no one likes his plan.

On the positive side, perhaps this means a whole new dance routine will be required?

The Penguin

Hmmmmm, I Wonder?

Scientists at Rolls Royce built a gun specifically to
launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners
and military jets all travelling at maximum velocity. The
idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions
with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.

American engineers heard about the gun and were eager
to test it on the windshields of their new high speed
trains. Arrangements were made, and a gun was sent to
the American engineers.

When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the
chicken hurled out of the barrel, crashed into the
shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens,
blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's
back-rest in two and embedded itself in the back wall
of the cabin like an arrow shot from a bow.

The horrified Yanks sent Rolls Royce the disastrous results
of the experiment, along with the designs of the
windshield and begged the British scientists for

You're going to love this......

Rolls Royce responded with the following one-line

Defrost the chicken !

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day

Michael Grade.

Useless Cunt.

The Penguin

Northern Lights, by Renaissance.

Annie Haslam's easy on the eyes as well.

The Penguin

Poor Jacqui Chose The Wrong Knackers

"Bob's always very quick to get me a nice Kebab!"

Showing a woefully poor judgement, our much admired Two Homes Economic Secretary placed great reliance in "Sir" Ian Blair and "Bob" Quick. Both are now departed from the stage, but the shit they dropped still sticks and stinks.

It was under the "leadership" of "Sir" Ian that the Met developed "kettling" and the TSG, which despite the best efforts of the current Commissar to defend the "vast majority" of his thugs is still in the headlines for all the wrong reasons. I wonder how many more post-mortems they will have over what remains of Ian Tomlinson's corpse, and will it make the Guinness Book Of Records?

And now her favourite "Bob" has managed to drop her into a nice mess, with the "Easter Terrorist Outrage" that never was. And it didn't even manage to get the Damian McBride and Dolly Dripper story from the front pages. Still, lots of work and money for m'learned friends for years to come.

I wonder who she will choose as her next favourite plod?

The Penguin

Something Is Seriously Wrong

What the fucking hell! Social Services, backed up by Inspector Knacker, kidnap an old lady from the care of her own family in order to force her return to an unsatisfactory and expensive care home that she was unhappy in.

These are the same god-playing tossers who fail to protect vulnerable children, such as the late Peter Connolly, and who fail to notice scrotes who are breeding benefit tickets by raping their own children.

The Penguin

Wednesday, 22 April 2009

The Dance Of The Comedian

Sheer Class, courtesy of Crown Blogspot.

The Penguin

Hoon Of The Day

"I predict it will all be over by Christmas!"

Just has to be Alastair Darling.

Incompetent Cunt.

The Penguin

Official - Biggest Wankers In British History

Their Place In History Is Assured

The IMF have let the cat out of the bag, and no matter what anodyne rubbish the black eyebrowed sock-puppet announces in the Budget, Britain has the largest cost of any nation for bailing out the fucking banks and it will cost every taxpayer dearly for generations and generations.

Brown and Balls, the architects of the useless tripartite banking regulation system, will be regarded by historians as the biggest wankers ever to work in the Treasury.

The Penguin

Making Friends And Influencing People

"We'll have to shoot your puppy, little girl, and then bill you for the bullet!"

Somehow I can't imagine it being part of an episode of Dixon Of Dock Green.

Surely the stupid bastards have some overpaid wanker supposedly in charge of public relations? If they have, sack them and hire someone who is up to the job. If not, get someone, and quick.

The Penguin

Surprise, Surprise!! No Evidence At All!!!

"The Arrest Of 12 Terrorists Was A Great Success And Nearly Saved Damian McBride's Arse!"

Tut, tut. Bit like the missing Weapons Of Mass Destruction that Sadaam Hussein was within 45 minutes of attacking Britain with, Inspector Knacker has completely failed to find any bombs or anything else that the 12 Pakistani students arrested in a huge blaze of publicity could have used in a "terrorist attack".

Now, a flightless bird with a cynical outlook might think that this is no big surprise and that the whole exercise was an attempt to dominate the Easter news agenda and divert the media spotlight away from the revelations that Guido was about to unleash.

What do you think?

The Penguin